IN FAITH....

SUPPORT, etc...

2012-01-24T15:24:00.000-07:00

Per many peoples' request, I am posting information on how/where you can send your support.

If you are going to commit to monthly support, please e-mail me and let me know how much. Also, I have more information for you if that's the case and want to privately e-mail you! (eefoley@gmail.com)

You can send your donor-preferenced gifts to YWAM, PO Box 3000, Garden Valley, TX 75771-3000. The checks must be made out to YWAM.

NOTE: Remember do not to put my name anywhere on the check but do enclose a separate note with my name.

Put my name on the other piece of paper as Erin Elizabeth Foley (they need it to be specific as possible so it'll go to my account.) After the first time giving you will receive a return envelop to continue to send in your donations so this is only necessary the first time.

If you choose to do BILL PAY from your bank account, you must put both my full name and your full name and address on the bill pay check when you send it out (in the memo line) Still make the check out to YWAM at the above address.

If you want to do an Automatic Withdraw on a monthly basis so the money is Automatically put into the account contact: julie.sinke@ywamtyler.org and she will get you the forms to fill out. (I HIGHLY recommend the autowithdraw so you don't have to worry about filling out everything on a

monthly basis.)

2011 PHOTOS

2012-01-14T00:45:00.000-07:00

Overlooking Townsville from Castle Hill.

Love on the Medical Ship

Vegamite: Australia Day!

At Crystal Creek with Rog and Mel.

Hidden Valley.... Queensland Australia.

Where most of our lectures and worship took place.

Team Timor in Ayr at a Brekkie Club.

Boxing Club in Ayr.

Building a road over a river.... all in a day's work. Airlie Beach.

Whitsundays!

Cross at Camping

The Love Feast.... or was that fest?

Free time at Camping in the evenings.

Where we ate breakfast, lunch, and dinner for 16 days.

Landing in Darwin.

Baggot Community church... in Darwin.

Sandwich making at Vinnie's. Darwin.

Adorable boy in Baggot Community.

BBQ on the dangerous, croc infested beaches of Darwin....so beautiful there.

East Timor.... the water source to the village. Got clogged a lot.

Worship every evening in Suertulan, East Timor.

Little Girl in Dili, ET praying.

I love! (Indian Ocean, baby!)

View from burned out building.

Last week of DTS.... the Aussies.

My hero, my brother, my friend, BEN!

My 10 Humphrey ladies....we shared a flat and a lot of fun!

Our absolutely amazing leaders.

I love Aussies! These guys are such an example of what men should be!

Marcelo in Gold Coast.

Ben and Jordan fishing on a sand bar.

Rog in his natural habitat.

My darling, Laurie!

In Sydney's Central Station.

Bondi Beach in the middle of winter.... June!

Jumpin' at Bondi.

Art Museum.

My 28th Birthday Dinner in Sydney.

Can't miss the Opera House!

How Do I Describe the Indescribible?

2012-01-14T00:10:00.000-07:00

I have been attempting to put 2011 into words. Or even the fact that this week one year ago, I headed to Australia to start an adventure that changed my life forever. I will admit, I started writing a few but haven't finished.

I cry, I ponder, I get lost in memories, good and bad. But, I can't seem to put it into words. I will try for you in the near future but I fear it will pale in comparison to what life really looked like this past year.

Plan "B"?

2011-12-20T02:01:00.000-07:00

It's imbedded in our culture. Part of the fabric of Western Society. The "back-up plan" also known as plan B.

In this context allow me to speak as a Christian to Christians.

It seems like in almost every decision we make, we have a few more in our pocket just in case the first one falls through.

"If college doesn't work out, I'll go into the military." "In case this spouse doesn't meet my needs I'll get a new one." "If all else fails I can do X, Y, and Z."

I will be honest, Plan "B" makes me angry! I see plan B as one of many things, none of them positive. Either we don't really believe we can follow through on our commitments or we don't really believe God.

I believe I am called into full-time missions. I believe that calling is to serve with Youth With a Mission using my journalism and photography for His glory. To reach nations.

The past few weeks I have been struggling with discouragement and doubt a lot about my calling. Part of it is because I haven't taken time to pray and hear from God like I should. The other reason is I've had Christian after Christian listen to where God is leading me. Then, wrapping up the conversation they say something like, "That's great, but what's your plan B if it doesn't work out."

Gutted!

Are you kidding me? Did I stutter? I KNOW GOD IS CALLING ME TO THIS. Now, either you don't believe me when I say that or you don't believe that God is big enough to handle what lies ahead. Either you are calling me a liar or you are saying God isn't sovereign.

Yes, that is a bold statement. Yes, sometimes God calls us to something and our own desires or expectations get in the way. I do not believe I am above that. I also have lived long enough to know it's not going to look exactly like what I think it will look like.

But, here's what I do believe. The Creator of the Universe has a plan and purpose for me. I know His voice because I have heard it thousands of times and checked it against His word to validate its truth. I look at His character and ask, "Is this something God would call me to?"

I also know a deep seeded calling on my life. I see glimpses and whispers of it back through my whole life.

I don't need a Plan "B".... I will go where He leads me until He tells me otherwise. There is NOTHING.... I repeat NOTHING I have ever found in the Bible that validates the Plan "B" we western Christians place so much stock in.

Moses didn't sit down with Aaron and say, "Well, just in case God doesn't really deliver us out of Egypt what do you think we should do?" NO. He uprooted thousands of people through the most impossible circumstances and left Egypt.

The apostle Paul was called to return to Jerusalem where he knew he would likely be jailed and killed for his faith. When he first told his fellow Christians they tried to dissuade him. But after he made it clear God asked it of him, they supported him. Why? Because they knew God is bigger than what they think lies ahead.

When I stepped on the Hillsdale College campus for a visit at 16-years-old, I knew it was the school God wanted me to attend. My mom begged me to have a back-up plan. She found other schools for me to apply to. I didn't. Months later I was accepted, soon after I had most of my school covered by scholarships.

When God called me to move to Boise on 48 hours notice, I did. I packed everything I owned into my car and drove 15 hours through a blizzard to a city I didn't have a place to live, didn't know anyone, and didn't have a job. I have never looked back and questioned that calling. I knew even when facing some tough obstacles, that God wanted me here.

The first time I went to Australia for my Discipleship Training School people thought I was insane and asked the same question. "What if this doesn't work out?"

I don't say this to walk in pride. I say all of this because I know the God I serve. At His name every knee will bow and every tongue confess that He is Lord! I know that He defeated death. I believe that He spoke and the universe came into being. The earth is His foot stool. The world and all it contains is His.

Why, oh, why do we walk according to any other plan than His? I certainly need to come before God to make sure my Plan "A" is His plan. But, as a friend recently told me, "God is not going to call you into the desert and leave you there."

Maybe, just maybe, we as Christians don't see change in the world because we don't really believe God is moving.

FRUIT (Testament to God's Faithfulness)

2011-12-18T19:35:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I wonder if my life really matters. Am I impacting the world? Is anyone really listening?

The resounding answer is "Yes." That's why the term Christian has a negative connotation attached to it in our culture. The world is watching, and a lot of the time they don't like what they see. The good news is, God moves despite our failed, flawed attempts.

I should be reflecting His light, but sometimes I wonder.

This week I had a tearful conversation with someone I've been friends with for about 5 years. I met her training for my claims job. When we did our second round of training in Los Angeles, we volunteered to be roommates since the hotel didn't have enough single suites.... trust me it was no sacrifice rooming with her in this huge hotel suite.

She is from Seattle, so a bit away but not too far from here. We got along great even though our lives and backgrounds were so different.

Later that year, I visited her in Seattle and got to meet her friends there, hang out and just talk a lot about life. I didn't realize at the time I was sharing my faith. God is just a key part of who I am, I guess He just comes out even when I don't think about it.

When I went home, I begged my Life Group to pray for her. So they did.

Fast-forward 4 years.... I see on facebook she is getting baptized. Next thing I know, this whole past year, she's going to church, talking about God, His Word.... She is now a Follower of Christ!

I recently wrote her to let her know how proud I was of all that she was walking in and how encouraging it was to see God working in her. She told me that being friends with me was part of that transition. She saw my faith and love for God and wanted it for herself. I cried. I bawled like a baby.

I don't say this to glorify myself. I'm sure there are people in this world who have a completely different view of God because I wasn't faithful in living for Him.

But, I say this in encouragement. I prayed for her in hope, but I guess like a lot of Christians, I wasn't sure if God would actually move. My faith was paltry at best.

God is faithful. He is so, so faithful. He loved her so much that He put her in my path because He was pursuing her. I was one of His many instruments to reach her heart.

Love people. Go love people. Tell them about what God's done to you, but they won't listen until we forget our pride and love them unconditionally. And, pray for them. Pray believing big things. At the time, I had no idea the outcome. I am so glad I got to see the fruit of God in me. I'm so glad I now have another friend who is living for God's kingdom!

Bold for Christ?

2011-11-28T11:48:00.000-07:00

I blew it! I completely screwed up! You know those opportunities staring you in the face and you completely walk away? I recently had one.

See on my DTS I felt pretty bold for Christ. It wasn't so bad going into the streets and sharing God with backpackers, teenagers, and random "townies". Probably because I knew I wouldn't be back and they'd never see me again (well, not until heaven I hoped.) It was also easier because I was with 36 other people doing the same thing. We'd pray together, encourage each other, and go.

That's all great but God wants us to be bold for Him as much in Jerusalem (home) as in Samaria (further away areas).

I was sitting at Java reading my Bible, journaling, sipping my Bowl of Soul before meeting with a friend to talk about her trip to Africa. A girl came in and sat close to me.... obnoxiously close. I was annoyed, of all the places in the coffee shop to sit it had to be within my personal bubble! This was MY "quiet time"! (Yeah, I still have a pretty selfish heart.)

Then (thinking somehow I own this little space of coffee shop) she has the nerve to start talking to people who pass through, apparently she knows them. I'm sitting so close I cannot help but hear her conversation. She's probably my age (mid-late 20's). Less than a year ago she woke up and was completely blind in one eye. The Dr's had trouble diagnosing it. It was an eye disease so rare hardly anyone in the US actually has it. There is nothing they can do. She was sharing with her friend about how terrified she was when it happened and she had to fly back to Boise from California where she is living all alone to be with her parents. She sounded so helpless and upset over her condition. It also seemed clear she wasn't a follower of Christ.

Her friend left the shop and she sat quietly typing on her laptop.

God prodded me, "I want you to pray for her." So I prayed. "No, I want you to go over to her and pray for her."

"God, are you kidding me? This place is busy but not busy enough no one would notice!"

"She needs to hear about ME and be healed!"

"Wait, God, you want me to go over to this stranger in this coffee shop I frequent, share You, and pray out loud for healing for a girl who isn't a Christian?"

"YES"

"Are you kidding me!?! They are going to think I'm nuts!"

I tried to negotiate with God.... perhaps sitting this close my silent prayers would heal her. A sign... I need a clear sign. (Okay, I heard God loud and clear on that one, I just wanted a miracle, like no one else but me and her in the coffee shop, God forbid people judge me!)

God wouldn't let me out of it but I was full of excuses (Oh, Moses, I know your pain.) What's more is not only was I afraid of man but what if I prayed for healing and God didn't heal her?

In the time I sat negotiating with God knowing clearly what He wanted me to do, my friend showed up and the girl left the coffee shop.

The worst part of all. I know I failed. I know what I was suppose to do. I wonder how cool and what a testament it would be to be able to sit here and glorify God for healing a stranger's blindness and bringing her.... if not those around who witnessed to Christ! And if she hadn't been healed? She still would have heard about God and had hope to cling to! But, deep down, I know she would have been. I let a person go blind because I was afraid of people's opinions! Seriously!?!

Worst of all, I possibly let people perish because of my fear. What's blindness compared to eternity separated from God? My prayer now.... don't let her suffer because I failed to move! I wonder how often God sees this in all of us. In our comfy churches. How much of the world hasn't heard because we were not bold for Christ? In Jerusalem, Judea, Samaria, and the ends of the earth?

When He is Sufficient

2011-11-17T12:48:00.002-07:00

I was raised to be fiercely independent. As a child, I remember helping my dad work on cars or the house, he'd tell me, "I don't want you to need anyone for anything." I grew up believing the "right way" was to be able to take care of myself in every aspect.

If I wanted something, I had to work for it. My family is made up of mostly Germans who arrived in America at the early 1900's. They were poor immigrants who worked very hard. That's what the American dream is all about after all, 'if you work hard enough, you will be successful.'

I started working at 13 years old. I took every job from painting, to babysitting, to mowing, farm labor, etc. Once I could legally work, I had about 3 jobs at one time all the way through high school. If I wanted something, I worked for it. I wanted to go to college so I worked hard in high school to get good grades, eventually leading to mass quantities of scholarships to a great private college. (to my non-American friends, college/university isn't paid for here.)

This pattern kept on my whole life. I did it. No one else helping.

That's where I've been so wrong. I've completely missed the mark. First of all, I am grateful to my parents for pushing me and teaching me about cars, household repairs, building things, cooking, education, etc... But, I'm learning I am not sufficient and how damaging that outlook on life really has been.

I look back on my last real 'relationship'. He was gone for a long time overseas in Iraq. I could be there for him as much as possible, but still have my freedom. Still look out for me. He came home and was soon super frustrated with me. In my independent thinking, I didn't let him serve me. While I never realized until too late that I was doing it; I just failed to ask him for help when I needed help. I wanted him around. I wanted him to take care of me, but had no idea how to allow him to be the man. Why ask when you can just do? Right? After all, I didn't want to be "needy".

"God helps those who help themselves." I can't tell you how many times I've heard that. We think this is scripture. We disdain those who can't.

If you ever pick up a Bible, you find quite the contrary. God helps the weak and helpless. God sustains. He took a group of helpless people who were enslaved for 100's of years and made them His people. I've been reading the Old Testament and I see time and time again how God provides. Seriously, food that falls from heaven each day! No water.... no problem, just hit this rock.... gush, WATER! At war against tens of thousands of men; it's cool, God defeats them with 300 Israelites.

Doesn't James say, "True religion is this.... to provide for the widow and orphan." Not exactly those who help themselves.

My work ethic.... a gift from God. My brains that got me into a great college, all God. My jobs, also God.

The longer I live, the more I see it was never me providing for me. God has strategically placed people and events in my life. Recently I've been getting ready to head out onto the mission field.... Long-term. In the meantime, I've been struggling to make ends meet; I feel like a huge failure!

That's when God spoke up. "It's not you, it's never been you." "I'm not going to give you success right now because when I provide for you in missions and in life, I want you to know it was ME and ME alone who was carrying you."

In fact, God did more. He challeneged me at the beginning of my jobs to give. Sacrificially, painfully. Not because He needs my money. But so I can know it was Him.

Does independence come at a cost? Too high. I cannot make it one day without God sustaining me. I find myself pushing life like a huge, growing boulder up a hill when I try to do it on my own. As soon as I let go, it's amazing where He takes my life. All that I have, whether through my toil or not, is His and from Him. Not only Him, but the people He has put me into contact with.

While I've prided myself in being able to run half-marathons, wear 4" heels, shingle a house, cook carrot cake from scratch, and change a car's oil.... Turns out, this life was never about me and what I can do after all.

Prayer Requests (Just the beginning!)

2011-11-02T13:33:00.000-06:00

Just got all of my visa paperwork for Australia today. I am feeling unbelievably overwhelmed. Didn't realize all that goes into this.

-Pray I get the local info like fingerprints and police background paperwork in by the end of the week, filled out and ready to go.

-Pray, I can get my paperwork from the FBI (yes, I have to get a bunch of stuff from them) expediently. They say it can take up to 3 months to get that back, I have to have it way sooner to send in my visa info. (Pray it takes 1 month or less).

-On top of all of the paperwork to send to the Aussie gov, they are saying I need a minimum of $28,000 a year to live in Aus. I have done a budget over and over again and feel I need about half that. I don't want to raise more support than necessary but the Aussie gov may not give me a visa if I can't prove I have that much coming in.

-In that, pray support starts coming in, so I can prove I will have money when over there.

-Finally, I have a memory stick with a ton of this info on it from my first trip to Aus. It has been MIA for the past 2 months and I have no idea what happened to it. I have literally looked everywhere possible. Pray it comes up. That will save me money and days worth of time if I can find it.

At The Beginning (Praise and Prayers)

2011-11-01T14:49:00.001-06:00

Well, this is really happening.

Over the weekend I got the message that I was officially accepted to join the Staff at the YWAM base in Townsville, QLD. Reef to Outback here I come. After much excitement, reality swept over.... in the next three weeks I will need $1000-$1500 for the initial start up. $450 for staff training and supplies, $400-$600 or so for health insurance (required by the Australian government), and finally $300+ for my visa application.

It swept over me hard and I got a bit overwhelmed... but I know this amount is nothing for God to handle.

In other praise, I found out all of the giving can be funneled through YWAM accounts in Tyler, TX which means all of my monthly supporters will be able to claim their giving on taxes! I also got my first supporters this weekend!!!!

And, finally, another huge praise is knowing that my friend from DTS, Marcelo (from the UK), will be returning with me to join the staff! I can't wait to do another step in this journey with him!

Applied

2011-10-21T15:03:00.000-06:00

Well, I am officially in the beginning of the whole big process. Got my application for the Pursuit done and handed in to be a "sent" missionary from the church. Now, my application to YWAM to be on staff is in and being processed.

It's a bit scary at this point. Things start feeling really real and less of a dream when the wheels get in motion! Am I really taking steps to spend my life in missions?

It's one thing to talk and dream of it, it's another thing to do it! I am so excited, nervous, and ready all at once.

But, with this is the beginning of the hard part too. When and if I am accepted, I now have to raise full support for 2 years and get my Australia visa in process and accepted. (From my understanding, the visa is the hardest part!)

Well, here's to You, God! You know and I give it to You since I know only if it's Your plan will it ever succeed!

Team Timor... Unity and Joy

2011-10-03T00:20:00.001-06:00

I remember the moment.... a few weeks into our DTS our Outreach teams were put together. We all went off and prayed about what team God wanted us on. The staff also prayed. Out of us 37 students, there would be 4 teams. I hated the idea of leaving some of the 37 behind. I loved everyone so much!

I thought for sure I would be on the PNG hiking team. A day before the teams were to be announced, our leader (Naomi) came to me and asked if I would be okay with not getting my first choice. I wanted so badly to be on the "crazy, adventure team" but when I prayed about it felt like God just said, "Be open." So, I said "yes".

Our teams were announced.... all the other teams were jumping up and down, screaming, so excited. Our team blankly stared at each other. Could this be wrong? God really know what He was doing? I think deep down we were all a little disappointed. Of all the odd mixes of personalities, we were like the "left over" team. And, my leaders were the two staff members I knew the least.... neither had lead an Outreach before.

Don't get me wrong, I really liked everyone on our DTS a lot! And, I really liked all of the individuals on my team.... but together? We only had 2 guys.... one was the youngest person on our DTS, the other was hard to get to know and kept to himself a lot. Of us 8 girls, we had the quietest, girly-girls. If you wanted fashion advice you would come to our team but definitely not to build houses in East Timor! Other than Rachel and Malloree, I felt I hardly knew anyone on the team. The first few meetings it was hard to even fake excitement about being on this team. I think we all felt it.

Our first Outreach in Australia got off to a decent start. We had a lot of good ideas and things seemed pretty easy. We worked in schools and with youth groups a lot. Not really what I wanted to be doing, but it wasn't too bad. There were still little divides going on but we hardly noticed. Certain girls seemed to group together. Some people seemed like they didn't speak up or have much of a voice.

A week in, things exploded. It didn't help that it rained non-stop and we were stuck in a big open church with no where to go. Our leaders had left to run errands and we were planning the day's events. No one could agree. People started speaking disrespectfully.... the small tensions went to large tensions. After arguing, praying, throwing out ideas, arguing more.... nothing concluded. Finally, I lost my temper and stormed out of the church we were staying in. I knew if I stayed I'd say something I would regret. I sat in a tree in the rain with my Bible and wanted so badly to hitch-hike back to Townsville. I wanted so badly to say "I quit! I didn't come halfway around the world to revert to a petty 18 year old!"

One of the girls and I had been good friends up to this point. I adored her! Since being on Outreach, I felt like we faced off a lot. I was mad at her but didn't know why or have a reason. Needless to say, our leaders came back, we apologized to each other, prayed, and things definitely got better. Not great, but better.

We all returned from our first 3 weeks of Outreach. All of the teams had a good time but definitely some struggles with unity and personalities. Then, we had a week of lectures on Spiritual Warfare. The more the lecture spoke, the more I realized how I had let little thoughts and attitudes open doors to Satan getting a foothold. I looked back on our team and saw it clear as day that we had all played right into it without even knowing!

We got together as a team and talked about it. We all saw it. We all saw where we went wrong. We apologized and prayed together specifically about our attitudes and unity. I met with Mal separately and apologized for my attitude against her. I felt so terrible that I had been so angry with her over nothing, realizing it was all created in my own mind. Being the oldest, I should have been way more focused on the team and their needs rather than my own. I was so impressed with her response and forgiveness.... she had a depth of character and faith I needed to be learning from. Somewhere in that week, we really became a team. I was given a heart for everyone on the team, seeing the value in their unique nature.

Right before we left on our second Outreach, the base prayed for us. I remember specifically they prayed for "Unity" and "Joy". Something we didn't have the first time around.

PRAYER WORKS! Our second Outreach in Darwin and East Timor was one of the biggest blessings. We had so much fun together. No matter what the task I remember laughing with everyone. When we made decisions as a team, I felt like people were being heard, opinions mattered, we respected each other. The girls I hardly knew, I realized I had a ton in common with! Ben and Sam really stepped up as men and leaders! Maddie and Chelsea, our leaders, were streamlined and effective, they listened to us and really considered every decision with prayer.

When it came to living in a "shed" in East Timor and building houses, our "girly-girls" became experts. Everyone worked so hard, stepped up to every task at hand, and did it with a great attitude. I was so impressed by their maturity!

God put this team together. He knew in all of our weakness there was a strength to impact our Outreach locations.... and each other. We were more than a team, we became a family. I can't imagine serving with any other 11 people.

God taught me many lessons through this "left-over" team.... What appears to be the most mismatched, unlikely group anything is possible through putting God first. And, never make pre-assumptions about people and situations.... what you think will be an uphill battle usually turns out to be one of the best things in your life!

Our team: Maddie was a prayer warrior with a deep seeded joy... and grew a ton as a leader. Chelsea was sweet and nurturing. She cared deeply about people's hearts.

Sam had a deep understanding in spiritual matters, he was smart and mature for his age but also brought a fun element in still being "a boy" at heart. Ben lead well; he helped us with block laying.... put up with a lot of girly topics of conversation, pursued God, and could captivate an audience with his speaking.

Liz was very creative and full of ideas for teaching and projects. She was sweet and every minute of free time had her Bible open, working her way relentlessly through the Word. Courtney loved deeply... she fell in love with the kids in East Timor, spending every free moment with them. She had an amazing ability to hear from God in every situation.

Katie was thoughtful, considering everyone's needs before her own. She worked hard in everything she did whether anyone was looking or not. Hannah was our super star. There wasn't anything she wouldn't try and succeed at... everything was done to perfection, she learned the local language quickly, learned guitar, excelled at every sport we played and did it all with a smile.

Fanny was very passionate and compassionate. She is training to be a doctor and it's clear her concern for people's well-being. She also has a very spunky, and hilarious side. "Making laugh people" as she would say. Malloree stepped up in an older sister, leader role to the team. She made sure people were doing well emotionally. She made friends throughout the little village with the old and young.

Finally, Rachel, displayed an amazing faith from her very quiet nature. She kept people grounded (especially me), had a fantastic attitude in all that we did. And, just used her calming nature to keep the team united.

This Is A Call Out

2011-09-28T23:57:00.001-06:00

Copy of my support letter.... here's my heart.

In January I embarked on an adventure that took me to Australia and East Timor. For a long time I have had a heart for missions but had no idea what that looked like. I dreamt of taking off a month to build houses in Africa or work with lepers in Nepal. God had different plans. The more I prayed about it, I felt like God was saying, "I don't want one month of you a year; I want all of you all year."

I spent 6 months doing an intense course called the Discipleship Training School with Youth With A Mission (YWAM). Never could I have imagined the way God would move. For the first time in my life, I woke up everyday and knew this is what I was created for.

In my first months there, I had three different people (two I did not know personally) come to me and tell me God gave them the word "Refinement" when they prayed for me. I suffered for 15 years from panic attacks; some so bad I was hospitalized. I was insecure in my faith and in my self-worth and walked in pride. In this time, God renewed my mind and refined my heart. I can, with absolute assurance, say I am free from anxiety! I know that I am a conqueror and coheir with Christ! And, that none of this is possible on my own strength.

My Outreach team spent time in Ayr working with children of all ages putting on programs to teach them about God. In Airlie Beach, we went into the streets sharing the Gospel with backpackers and BBQing for them. In Darwin we worked with churches, homeless shelters, and in aboriginal communities. Our work ranged from making hundreds of sandwiches for the homeless to running entire church services.

Finally, we spent 3 weeks in Seurtulan, East Timor (a tiny village literally built on the side of a mountain). We lived in a shed, took bucket baths, used a squatty-potty, and were awoken by rats almost every night. We built houses, taught English, basic health care, and Bible stories and would meet with people in the village to talk and pray. Every night, faithfully, people would come for worship and the Word. (If you want to know what real worship sounds like, have a guitar and about 30 kids singing at the top of their lungs all squished in a tiny room!)

Seurtulan taught me many great lessons. These people had little more than a bowl of rice and the clothes on their backs, yet they had a joy I've never experienced. They hungered to know more. The adults started showing up to the kids' lessons to learn more about the Bible! I got to glimpse the wholeness of the Gospel. We can't feed their souls but leave them uneducated and starving. Just like we can't give them a home but not give them a chance to know God. An incomplete Gospel still leaves them needy. James 1:22-27, "But prove yourselves doers of the word, and not merely hearers who delude themselves... Pure and undefiled religion.... is this; to visit the orphans and widows in their distress, and to keep oneself unstained by the world."

Our speaker for our lectures on missions asked us, "If money and ability were no issue, how would you spend your life?" My answer: use my gifts for journalism and photography to travel the world making God known, being a voice for the voiceless.

That same week, I found out our YWAM base in Townsville was one of a few in the world, spearheading an international news organization called "Grassroots News". The goal is to report on what is really happening around the world in order to inform and mobilize people to take action.

Years ago, I thought my dreams of journalism and photography were just that.... dreams. After months of prayer, I know God is asking me to pick them up and spend my life using them for His glory. He gave me this life verse: Proverbs 31: 8-9, "Open your mouth for the mute, for the rights of all the unfortunate. Open your mouth, judge righteously, and defend the rights of the afflicted and needy."

Long-term mission, living in jungles with mosquitos and no A/C had no appeal to me. In refinement, I now cannot wait to be doing just that!

Matthew 28:19 says, "Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit teaching them to observe all that I commanded you..." In this God doesn't give us an option. If we are followers of Christ, we are given this command. We all have a role to play in seeing the Kingdom of Heaven here on earth.

I would like you to stop and pray. Consider what this looks like in your life.

I am putting together, or rather God is orchestrating, a team of people to walk with me into missions. This will include support through prayer, regular contact, and monthly expenses. This is not an "either, or" but an "all of the above". I feel called to commit at least 2 years to this program and the rest of my life to missions. This will not be possible without God and without the community He has placed around me.

I know there may be more to be considered and would love to have a conversation with you to answer any further questions.

Waiting is the Hardest Part

2011-08-24T19:12:00.000-06:00

I have started two new jobs which I am very grateful for. They help pass time quicker and provide income and savings I need to return to Australia. But, waiting really is the hardest part.

My new jobs now conflict with most of my friends' work schedules. It also conflicts with Life Group. Free time normally equates, Erin time. I get things accomplished but there are only so many hours in a day for reading and chores.

Feeling pretty lonely. My friend, Christina, just left to embark on a two+ year adventure to England with Operation Mobilization. I am so excited for her, but that leaves me with limited friends who have a heart/understanding for missions. Two other good friends just had babies, making their whole world a whole different world than mine. Feeling pretty lonely.

Let's face it. I miss Australia. I know I'm going back but those six months stretch out ahead of me as if eternity. I miss my DTS family who are scattered across the globe. A lot of them are returning to University.

While other lives seem to move on to marriage, university, kids, world missions, mine feels like it is standing still. Nay, I feel as if I am being pulled backward. It's been two months since I left Australia and this time feels longer than the six months I was there.

I know this is me complaining. I really have a good life and no hardships, so I shouldn't complain. I have a wander-lust. A desire to go do. A desire to use my time to be meaningful. My love language is acts of service and physical touch.... two things I'm missing a lot. Once, I get my work schedule worked out, I plan on serving in the community, however, right now it's scattered all over.

But waiting is the hardest part!

Returning to Oz....

2011-08-07T20:32:00.000-06:00

A few years ago at my church, we sang a song. It went something like "all I am is Yours". My pastor asked us after we got done singing if we really meant that or if we were still holding something in our hands. I knew I was. I was holding on to security and comfort. The next time we sang that song I lifted my hands and opened them. In my heart I said, "God, I want to mean this. Everything I am and have really is Yours. Use me, even if it's going to be scary."

Shortly after that, I felt called to foreign missions. Eight months ago, I was on a plane headed to Australia. I sat there thinking, "Is this really happening? I just quit a really good job in a bad economy. I left so many friends and an amazing church. But, I'm so excited!"

My entire 6 months of the Discipleship Training School, I was praying about what was next. I knew I was wrecked for the ordinary. I couldn't just go back to the States, get a normal job, tithe 10%, go on short-term mission trips every few years.... I knew I was created for something so much bigger.

It came to an accumulation during week 5, Lordship week, when I knew God was asking me to lay Boise at His feet and surrender to where ever He would call me next. I didn't want to but I did it.

Still every time I prayed about my future, God wouldn't give me an answer. I felt like He kept telling me to live in the "here and now". Not looking to what is next all the time. It was a huge lesson and I'm so glad I did because I learned so much and enjoyed my time.

I was frustrated, however, the week of graduation when I still didn't know. Frustrated further as I traveled Australia afterward and didn't have any answers.

After visiting my last group of friends at the Gold Coast before flying back to Sydney to return to the States, I cried my eyes out. I thought I would completely fall apart on the plane. Tears streamed down my face. I felt like I had just grown hugely and now I would be returning to the States with no job and no idea what was next.

After a nightmare of backed up flights in Sydney (volcanic ash wreaking havoc on Australia's flights), I boarded my plane to return. I wanted to cry more. I was leaving a place I loved so much. Would I ever see it again?

I sat in my seat and a peace fell over me. As we took off, I felt incredible comfort. Then I heard God's voice in a whisper. "It's okay, you're coming back."

But, how? And when? I still didn't know. So I took comfort that some day I would return.

After getting back the more I thought about returning to staff in Townsville, the more excited I got. I honestly didn't think I would go back on staff. It didn't feel like an option when I was there. I don't know why, but it didn't. Now, I don't know how I missed that option the whole time.

So, after more prayer, I will be returning to Australia in 2012.... likely early March. Until then, I will raise support, work, and trust God for further direction. I'm so excited!!!

Lame-o

2011-07-14T22:13:00.000-06:00

I'm sorry to those who actually read this. I stopped updating about halfway through my DTS journey. I have loved going back and reading the old posts. Was that really only a few months ago?

I will give more insight into what God did in me and on Outreach. But, for now, I mourn having left Australia. I am back in the States, preparing for what is next.... which includes a tiring job hunt. I know I am called to full time, long term missions. Researching and looking into what capacity that will look like and the shape it will take.

Until then, I will use this ground, here in Boise as my mission field and try to remember I am here for a reason. I am back in the waiting season that I hate but will endure because I know everything God has planned for me is worth the wait!

p.s. I miss Australia so much. Completely fell in love with that country and those people!

Australia Outreach Photos

2011-04-20T04:53:00.000-06:00

Katie's 19th Birthday (in Burdekin Baptist Church where we stayed)

Sam prying open a coconut.

Chappy Scott teaching some boxing moves.

Our guys with the Home Hill Boxing Club.

After school program in Home Hill.

YWAM Base in Airlie Beach.

Rachel and I in Airlie Beach.

Hannah and I on the ship headed out to the Whitsundays to snorkel the Great Barrier Reef.

Whitsundays.

Chelsea about to eat a green ant. (taste like lime)

More Whitsundays.

My Outreach leaders, Chelsea and Maddie, super excited about the Whitsundays.

Most of my Outreach team. (me, Chels, Sam, Maddie, Fanny, Ben. Front: Hannah, Rach, and Court)

Airlie Beach (Australia Outreach part II)

2011-04-20T04:31:00.000-06:00

After 10 days in Ayr, we went to the Whitsundays... the name for Airlie Beach and a series of islands off of there. It is a huge tourist/backpacker area. It rained a good portion of the time we were there, but it was still one of the most beautiful places I have ever been in my life. We stayed at the YWAM base, which was a huge house on 5 acres of rain forest, built into the side of a huge hill.

There was a creek running through the driveway, which we spent a good number of hours building back up the driveway where it washed out and putting in drainage pipes under it. It was so much fun, getting muddy in the pouring rain and standing in the creek chucking rocks up onto the roadway.

Our first day there, a World Race team was staying with us. They were all Americans. Anyway, they were a wonderful group of people, traveling around 11 countries in 11 months doing missions. We got to have worship and prayer time with them. It was so great to be with another really passionate group of young Christians!

We went into the city on a daily basis and did street evangelism. We would pray that God would bring us to people and give us words to speak to them.... we pray all the time here and it is amazing how God moves when you are walking in that. Learning to listen to God in even the smallest things in life really prepares you for the big things. Now, I have no problem talking to strangers, but boldness to speak what God tells you to can be hard ("fear of man" struggle). We also prayed over the city and some of the strongholds we felt were there.

I went with a Kiwi girl, Courtney, on our first day. She is sweet and very quiet. But, she has shown herself as someone who hears God on everything she does. We passed a woman sitting on a bench at the beach. Both of us felt like God wanted us to talk to her. So we stopped. We prayed for God give us the right words to speak to her, then we approached her. Her name was Leanna, she was in her 40's and from Sweden.... backpacking up the coast with her daughter. We had a great conversation, learned that she quit her job of 20 years, sold her house because it had always been a dream of hers to travel around the world. She was not a Christian.

We told her about what we were doing and why God called us to Australia. As we talked, I felt we needed to be more bold, however. Despite the fact that she knew nothing about Christianity, I felt like she was pretty close to entering into a relationship with God. So, I asked her if I could pray for her. She said, "Yes." I sat down next to her and words from God just poured out. I prayed she would find God on her journey and that He would bless her with direction and a job when she returned home, etc... then we made it clear to her that when these things happened in her life, she needed to remember that it was God who did this for her because He loves her and sees her where she is at in life and wants to draw her close to Him. IT WAS SO COOL! I've never been so bold and I knew it was God completely directing me. I still pray for Leanna but really believe she will be a Christian soon!

We have more and more stories of instances like that. I couldn't get over how much God spoke through us to people from all over the world. We threw free BBQs and went around the main streets inviting people. We usually got about 75-90 people show up over the course of a few hours and we got to talk to them all. I met some amazing girls from Nepal, tons of French, German, and British. Pretty much none of them were Christian, but most were really open to hearing about God and what He's done for them and some were open to us praying for them. We never forced it on anyone, but were bold when we felt it was necessary.

We also had a free day and a family in Ayr gave us money to have fun with, so we took a boat out to the islands and went hiking and snorkeling. That's right, I snorkeled the Great Barrier Reef!!! How cool is that?!? Despite my fear of fish, I wouldn't pass up the opportunity. We had to wear "stinger suits" because it is jellyfish season and they are deadly out here. I learned that I am not a mouth breather and really struggled with the snorkel. I met a guy from Mexico on the boat and got to talk to him about God. He quit his job and is traveling the world and wants to go into some form of humanitarian work.

Anyway, way more happened, but you all have already read way too much if you got to this point....

Ayer (Aussie Outreach part 1)

2011-04-12T01:18:00.000-06:00

The first e-mail is about the first place we went on Outreach. Ayr, Queensland. It is about an hour south of here. It has about 8000 people and is a farming community. Picture Nebraska but with sugar cane about 8 ft tall rather than corn. People in Ayr were super friendly. In fact, so friendly, we were severely over-fed. Everyone wanted to get us dinner or bring us snacks. I think I gained about 10 lbs in Ayr.

Our first night we were taken up a huge hill to have a BBQ. Our van (which we named Bruce) stalled out and started to roll backward on the last push of the hill; it was so steep it was almost straight up. Maddie (one of my leaders) was driving and after throwing on the E-Brake we all jumped out. Sam (one of the guys on my team) turns out is an incredible driver and hopped in, got the van up the hill.... we finished by walking. We have christened this hill "Mozzie Hill" because the mosquitoes were beyond horrible, we were covered from head to toe. (They call mosquitoes "mozzies" out here.)

We mostly did school programs and went to churches/youth groups. Our second night our team was split between two churches. We prayed about where we should go and who should speak. We ended up at this tiny church with pretty much everyone over 60 (that's being generous with age).... it looked like a retirement home from the early 90's.... pastels everywhere! Our 3 quietest people felt called to speak, so they gave their testimonies. They did great! The church was really encouraged to have young people there and really had a heart for enlarging their church and bringing younger people in but weren't sure how to do it.

We did a lot of school programs. In Australia the schools have chaplains and religious educations classes. Unfortunately the need for teachers greatly out-weighs the amount of students enrolled, so a lot of schools are lacking the chaplains and teachers. We also ate lunch with kids at the schools, played with them at recess, and did yard work. We had a blast and the kiddos really loved having us around. We also did after school programs that were specifically Christian. It was really cool to openly talk about God in the public schools.

My favorite kiddo was Sharnie. She was about 7 or 8.... slightly chubby island girl with short curly black hair. She had the biggest smile and was precious. She was eating alone at lunch and when asked said that no one ever wanted to sit with her. She followed Maddie and I around everywhere and always wanted to hold our hands. She was glowing every time we came to the school and saw her.

Youth group was really cool too. I felt called to speak on the closeness and intimacy of God and what He has done in my life. One of the girls started crying part way through my talk. I got to talk to her later and found out her parents were separated and hated each other. Her dad has had cancer for a year and her mom didn't seem to care and her brother was too little to understand. She felt like no one cared and she had to carry it all on her own. We prayed for her, encouraged her to continue to seek God through this, and challenged the other girls in the youth group to walk with her through this. The other girls were really awesome and stepped up.

Otherwise, there is way too much detail to go into. I appreciate all of my work at the Pursuit serving with kids because it has come in really handy for Outreach. I have taught hundreds of kids now songs and dances that we did in Xtreme Life... and they loved it!

To wrap up, just wanted to tell about one of my Outreach leaders. She was my absolute joy on Outreach! Her name is Maddie (Madeline), she is 20 and from England. She has such a gift for uniting people and bringing out the humor in everything. We pretty much experienced 2 of the 10 plagues of Egypt in Ayr.... flies and frogs/toads. We were infested with bugs of all shapes and sizes for half the time.... not exaggerating, they were falling from the ceilings and crawling all over us. The frogs showed up shortly after.... king toads and tropical frogs of every color and size.... oh, and we had a mouse run out of one of the girls bags one night. It was really frustrating and every time someone screamed or got angry about it, Maddie would just laugh. She just has joy bubbling up in her... and when she prays, things happen. I've rarely seen anyone so in-tune with hearing God's voice.

Camping Photos (Hidden Valley, QLD)

2011-03-16T22:29:00.000-06:00

God's Provision

2011-03-16T21:54:00.000-06:00

Typed: March 15, 2011

We had an evening of giving. We were told to go pray about what God would like us to say to people (words of encouragement or Bible verses), as well as items and money. God called me to give my spending money to a few people who still needed Outreach funds, as well as a few other items.

When we got there, they had all of the people who still needed funds to stand up at the front. They wrote out how much each person needed and totaled it for both DTSs (mine and the Not For Sale). It was $10,664 and some change. Then they asked us to pray for them. Those called to contribute to them to give them the financial gifts. After about 20 minutes of this, we added how much everyone got. There was less than $3000 left in need. Then, they asked for those who hadn't given but now felt like God was calling them to contribute to also give. After about 5 minutes everyone had their full funds!!! All of this was given sacrificially from other poor students, not outside funds. It was amazing how God just multiplied and provided huge amounts of money! You wouldn't have believed it unless you were there! It was so cool.

Then, we had a time of communion and committed to each other through prayer. I have really felt drawn to a certain girl. She is an Aussie, 21 years old. She lost her mom to cancer when she was 16 and she is the oldest in her family. Her dad remarried almost immediately and she moved out on her own soon after. She has experienced some abuse. She was very much a loner when we first got out here. Anyway, I prayed about it and have really been seeking a friendship with her from the beginning. I just felt like I needed to commit to being a big sister to her and hold her accountable and pray for her regularly. It was really cool to just spend time in prayer with her and commit to walking with her through life, no matter where we are at. She was cute and finished by telling me she feels like deep down I am really Australian and belong here.... prophetic? We'll see. She is one of about five Aussies who has told me they think I am secretly an Australian posing as an American. I do get along with them the best.

Anyway, then we had a time of giving gifts and items to each other. During Lordship week, I had given away some books I really liked to people who I felt needed them more. Well, my darling Brit, Laurie, gave me two books without knowing I had given away my books. They are 2 books written by journalists about the middle east and central asia.... which is the area I've been reading about lately. They look incredible and I can't wait to start reading. It was just a huge blessing to see how God spoke to people to give up things and all of the things they gave were items the person who received them had really needed or wanted.

Biblical Studies Lecture

2011-03-16T21:50:00.000-06:00

Typed: March 10, 2011
This has been a great week back. It has pretty much not stopped raining and I am so thankful that I am no longer sleeping in a tent. My clothes smell good, not like campfire and moldy tent. I am ready for some sun. Hopefully we will get some this weekend since we leave next weekend for Ayer... the beginning of our Australia Outreach.

This week we have been doing a lecture on Biblical studies. Learning how to read and study the Bible. They really encourage us knowing the Word. I really enjoyed it. We took the book of Philemon and did chapter titles and then highlighted things like the who, where, repeated words, and then we went through the text and discussed what was known from reading it. Then we further delved into the culture and region at the time to gain a better understanding of the people involved in the letter. Then, we discussed not just knowing but applying the text to our lives. (This was one of my favorite lectures so far!)

A few more highlights from camping: not only did we get to hike some really amazing scenery but one of the girls found a wounded wallaby (small kangaroo like animal) and its baby. Roger (the "Aussie bloke" in my class) ended up having to kill the wallaby since it was paralyzed but he saved the baby.... I will post photos as soon as I can. He put the baby in his hat and everyone passed it around and cuddled it. He and Ben (our Aussie leader) got up every hour of the night to give it water. The next day they transported it to a wildlife refuge and it was saved! We also got invaded at nights by paddy melons (small marsupials that look like giant mice... I enclosed a photo I took offline).

Outside of lectures, we spent the week getting ready for our first Outreach. We learned a really great skit/dance to an Underoath song.... great band. We are also putting together teachings and activities to do. Our Aussie outreach is in a week. We go to Ayr, Bowen, and Whitsunday. In Ayr we'll be working in schools (you can teach religion in schools here), Bowen mostly with churches and backpackers, and Whitsunday we'll be doing more building, cleaning communities and meeting with backpackers since it's a huge tourist area.

CAMPING and LIFE

2011-03-16T21:48:00.000-06:00

Typed: March 6, 2011

This afternoon we returned from "Hidden Valley" Queensland. It was an interesting time of camping and lectures. I am exhausted and smelly.

First day there I got heat stroke. Then, it pretty much proceeded to rain for almost the whole 2 weeks. My tent was flooded. We readjusted, set up tarps, then had another hard rain and flooded again. Finally moved our tent out of the swamp our campsite became and it still got wet but not nearly as much. I also got a cold due to being wet all the time. So, it was fairly miserable in a lot of ways but also really good. Most of the time it was just our DTS and the Not For Sale DTS, so about 60 of us total. No phones, no internet, no cars, noooooo anything so we got to spend a lot of time together and in nature (despite the rain, we played).

Lectures our first week there were the most intense so far. It was on Lordship (making sure God is the first thing in our life in every area). Our speaker was this hyper Kiwi man, Mark Parker. And when I say hyper..... I mean really hyper. He would end most of his sentences with "SHUT UP! You're not the center of the world!" He was hilarious, but also a very powerful speaker. I'm still processing through a lot of it. Recognizing how much crap is in our lives that keep us from fulling living for God and to the potential we are called to. God revealed a lot in my life.... especially pride. (Learning that pride isn't just thinking you are better than others, but involves a whole lot of other aspects).

I cannot get over how pretty Australia is. Yesterday we hiked to these ridiculous falls and rivers in a gorge. And when I say hiked, it was an adventure..... don't let Aussies tell you it's just an easy walk over a hill. We had to swim across 4 rivers and creeks, climb rocky hills, and then came to miles of these large rocks with waterfalls and pools everywhere. We climbed over so much stuff, swam another river after hiking across rocky ridges. I couldn't take my camera due to the conditions (it would have gotten destroyed). It was the most beautiful scene. I am cut up and sore but it was really fun. We did a talent show last night. It was hilarious! It was pretty much everyone doing skits making fun of everyone else. The best talent was when Aleski (a tall, 18 year old, really stereotypical Canadian guy) got up and told us he found verses in the Bible that really spoke to him and he was going to do interpretive music with it. He started reading some laws in the Old Testament like "do not boil a baby goat in it's mother's milk" and he played a recorder really obnoxiously after each law. I laughed so hard I almost stopped breathing. He was super serious the whole time.

Anyway, it was quiet the adventure. I think my feet are forever stained with mud.... mud, mud, mud everywhere, and my clothes are all damp and smelly. But, it was good. I'm going to enjoy regular showers while I can.

Crystal Creek Photos (Queensland, AUS)

2011-02-15T21:06:00.000-07:00

Pre-Camping

2011-02-15T21:00:00.000-07:00

Currently in my 4th week of lectures (5th week in Australia) and preparing for 2 weeks of camping.

Life is flying by in an exciting and amazing blur. Lectures have all been so intense. I know God is moving in me and building me up, I just pray that this isn't one of those temporary changes. I want this to be a lifetime change. To live deeper in His grace daily.

This week we are learning about intimacy and fear of God. How God longs for a relationship with us. One that is deeper than this distant creator but one that is close. Isaiah 62:5 ... as the bridegroom rejoices over the bride, so your God will rejoice over you...." Our relationship with God needs to be less about discipline and more about striving to know God on a deeper level. Read the Bible like a love letter from God rather than a strick set of rules and regulations. If we love Him, we will obey His commands because we want to serve Him.

Life has been awesome living in constant intercession and prayer. One of the things I love most about this place is that we are always living in prayer. In all that we do, we bring it to God. He is revealing Himself in ways I never knew He could.

On another note, had an amazing weekend. Youth Street on Saturday was Nerd themed. We (the Jan DTS) carried it to a whole other level of nerdiness. Seems like us leaders have more fun than the crew do half the time.

Sunday was "Fun-day" and we had pancakes for breakfast at one of our leader's houses. I don't think I've laughed so much in my life. We literally were just sitting in a group making faces. It's amazing how something so simple and childish can bring absolute joy. Then, I went with two of the Aussies in my class to Crystal Creek which is about an hour from here. It was beautiful. I will include photos.

Sunday-Funday with my Aussie friend, Emma, and Aussie leader, Dave.

What a bunch of Nerds! (Vianee "Ger", Laurie "UK", Chelsea "USA", Hannah "Den", Me)

A Glimpse of My Day

2011-02-08T21:42:00.002-07:00

5:15 am I get up. By 5:30 am I am running or hiking up the huge hill here with a group of my peers. The sun comes up around this time, so it's beautiful to sit at the top and stare out at the ocean. Then we hike back down.
Breakfast is at 6:45 am. We have quiet time to pray and read our Bibles for about an hour after that, then we either have worship or prayer time in groups for an hour or so.
We have lectures until 12:30 pm and then lunch. Lectures are pretty in depth, intense Christian and Bible teaching.
Then, we all have chores (I clean our flat which 9 girls live in).
We usually have an hour or so of free time (I usually swim or read), then dinner. Depending on the evening, we have free time or Outreach Prep and sometimes more lectures.
Saturdays we do "Youth Street" which starts at 1 pm. About 100 of the local teenagers come and spend time with us. I am on the Dance Team, so we teach and learn dances. We'll be performing in a few weeks.
Sundays are usually free days. We usually walk to the beach, swim, and play games. There are stingers (jellyfish) and tiger sharks here, so we can only swim within special nets set up.

Cockroaches, Cyclones, Sunburns, oh my!

2011-02-08T04:26:00.000-07:00

Life is a giant whirlwind.... possibly a cyclone.

Speaking of cyclones, I just went through my first hurricane. Category 5, one of the worst in Australian history. Yay, welcome to "Down Under."

We are into our fourth week of DTS. It is intense. My processing is going to take a long time. Just like when I returned from Nicaragua, I don't think half of this will hit me for months if not years.

Our first week of lectures was on our identity in Christ. Powerful stuff. Learning that we are co-heirs and conquerors through Christ. Why do we fear, what holds us back? Knowing that the God who created the universe is our advocate, we should stand in righteousness and truth. I wish I could give you a glimpse into what God did/is doing in me but am not sure if words are sufficient. I cannot live in the fullness of Christ, if I do not completely believe I am loved and made new through God. I started to realize this and refuse to let fear or anything else bring down what God has done for me and what He plans on doing in me.

The second week of lectures was on Confession/Repentance. Although we are new creations in Christ, in order to live for Him, we need to make sure we have a right heart and clear conscious before Him. If our thinking and actions are convoluted with sin, we allow things into our lives that are not in direct relationship in our service to Him. It is not just important to confess our sins to God, but sometimes we need to confess to others and be reconciled. Ken Mulligan, our base director, gave these lectures and really challenged us in our relationship with God, along with our knowledge of the Word.

We are now in our 3rd week of lectures and it is on relationships. So far, we are learning to have a right, healthy relationship with God. All of our other relationships are a reflection of our walk with God and our maturity in this area.

So far, I have really loved all of our lectures. But, it's not just about learning. If I can't take this knowledge and apply it, then it is useless. Pray my pride is broken and I am open to the fullness of what God wants to do in me. My friend (and staff leader), Maddie, had a word for me the first week. It was "Refinement". God wants to mold and refine me. I pray I am eager and willing.

What I'm saying here is a very pale, simple description of what we are learning. There is so much more depth to it. If you have more questions, feel free to ask.

As far as life goes, we had a blast celebrating Australia Day, a few weeks ago. Aussie, Aussie, Aussie, Oi, Oi, Oi!

Then, Australia week was followed by a cyclone which wreaked havoc on Townsville up to Cairnes. Thankfully, there was no loss of life that I know of. Lots of big trees blown over. We waited it out in our powerless, dark, hot, leaking flat. We had a bit of flooding, but otherwise, no real damage to our place. It was interesting running around in the middle of the night with a headlamp, winds blowing outside, trying to find pots, bowls, and buckets for the leaking ceiling.

More on life later. I know this is a really brief synopsis, but my brain is ready to explode so I'm going to go.

With love from Aus, Erin!

Photos

2011-01-25T17:25:00.000-07:00

Week 2 In Aus

2011-01-25T17:18:00.000-07:00

Sorry to all of you supporting me and reading this. I have had a lot of internet issues since arriving in Australia. I have some bigger posts and updates to put up but do not have the time right now.

I flew in with no issues 33 hours of flying and sitting in an airport were not pleasant but really wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. God really worked on me as far as my fear of flying goes.

The past week and a few days have been spent exploring Townsville, making new friends, attending lectures and worship, lots and lots of prayer, and going to the beach (also includes getting sun burned).

Note to self: Don't be a skeptic when told there is a hole in the ozone layer above Australia. There is and you will burn. I pretty much never burn and even wearing slathers of sunscreen, I fried. The good news is, I am really brown now. Barring having to get half my skin cut off from cancer, I should be okay.

God is doing amazing things here. After getting to know the people in my DTS, it was re-affirmed to me that I am where God wants me. My biggest concern in coming was the people's attitudes and reasons for being here. I have to say, from what I've seen of everyone's hearts displayed so far, they are crazy about God and willing to serve Him.

Simplicity

2010-12-30T00:07:00.001-07:00

Praise God for the gospel. Praise God for the simplicity.

I had an echoing reminder today as I got in my car after work. Sometimes we over-jumble and complicate our faith. We present the gospel as a litany of arguments, apologetics, and viewpoints. I thank God all of these concepts and ideas matter nothing to to pure Gospel.

Christ came because He loved us. We are flawed, less than God. Christ died as a sacrifice, the perfect lamb. We can be made perfect through Him. Either we pay for our sins or we accept His gift. If we accept that He is our Lord and our Savior, we have the assurance to live forever in communion with God. If we don't, we will pay and we will be separated.

There are not sects or denominations. There is nothing. Absolutely nothing we can do. It is through Him and Him alone. How blessed we are!

I was talking to an LDS co-worker today. The conversation started with him saying we basically believe the same thing. But the deeper he got, the more layers of works and levels and God-ship and never really knowing where you stand. Even after you are dead, there are still works, and things and possibly moving in positions from one heaven to another. There is prison where you pay for your sins. There is another level of judgement even after you are a follower of their gospel and have done all these works. And in the end, you still don't really know. How complicated?! How hard it must be! And, to end it all and move on to eternity where you will continue to struggle for your place. And, to never really be sure when you die of where you stand with God. I wanted to cry for him.

I praised God as I walked away from that conversation.... more of You and less of Me! It doesn't need to be complicated. There doesn't need to be a lack of assurance. I rest in knowing that Jesus is my Lord and Savior. He paid it all. He knows me and He loves me. Praise God!

Half-way There

2010-12-24T11:09:00.000-07:00

I sit here on Christmas Eve day, with less than 3 weeks until I leave. God has been providing in some big ways and my funding is 1/2 way there. Which, essentially, is enough to get me to Australia since I have my own savings. However, I would ask for prayers for more just so I don't spend every penny I have locked away. Thanks.

Love all of you! Have had so much love and support through this process. Almost to AUS!

T-Minue 1 Month

2010-12-11T13:57:00.000-07:00

Not much new to update on. Just 1 month left in the States before I depart. I am trying to privately journal as much as possible because it's good to look back at my prayers and see how God comes through. Always a good reminder.

Funding Update

2010-12-05T19:54:00.001-07:00

With promised, but mostly given funds, I currently need about $1700 by mid-December to reach my minimum goal. Pray, pray, pray. Somedays I'm at perfect peace about it, other days I'm a bit nervous. Here's the part where I continue to trust and jump in with both feet!

Boise: 5 Years

2010-11-27T17:25:00.000-07:00

Five years ago today (barely 22 years old), most of my worldly possessions were crammed into my 1989 Grand Marque station wagon. It was about 4 am in Castle Rock, CO and I drove off in the cold and snow. I had no idea what lie ahead but I knew I was going where God called.

I hit a blizzard outside of Cheyenne, WY. When I got out to fill up with gas, my car door froze shut. Planting my foot on the side of the car, I pulled with all my strength to get the door open and continue on my way. The next five to six hours were full of tension as I struggled to see the front of my car, let alone the road for all of the snow. The winds were harsh. I cried at a few points, tired and running low on money, I just wanted to get there.

"God, what am I doing?" I didn't have a job there. I didn't even know anyone there.... but I was moving to Boise.

I had been to Boise for about 48 hours a few weeks earlier. It was my first time in Idaho. The minute we drove into the city, I saw the desert mountains with snow lining them, the Cross alight on top of Table Rock, the sun was setting and the sky lit up in a bright pink, I knew this is where God would bring me. I did not know when or how but I knew I would end up here.

Years earlier in college, I felt called to missions. My parents were missionaries when I was younger. The closer I grew to God, the more I felt the call. The only difference was, my parents never had an anchor. They didn't have a home church to report to. We didn't have a city in the US to call home. Where we laid our heads was our home. I wanted things to be different. I knew no matter where I went, I wanted a place to call home.

A few weeks after visiting Idaho for the first time, I was back at my job as a nanny in Colorado. Before I had taken my vacation, things were not going well. I wanted to quit but felt bound to my year contract. Finally, after an accident by the five-year-old which sent the mom into an angry frenzy, I quit. I couldn't stand how the kids were treated by their parents and how I had no authority. I gave them until the new year to replace me. It was the Monday before Thanksgiving. Later that week, they came to me. "We feel it would be best for everyone if you were out by the end of the week." I had three days to pack all of my belongings and figure out what I was going to do.

I prayed. My parents were in West Virginia, my siblings in Texas, my friends mostly in the Midwest or out East, my grandmother in Arizona, and I had an offer at an old job in a resort town in Colorado. But, Boise kept coming to my head. I kept praying. My dad didn't like the idea of me moving further west. My friends were not supportive, and my grandmother wanted me back living with her. But, I could not shake that I was called to Boise. So I went.

After 15 tension filled hours of driving, I arrived in Boise after dark and found a hotel. The next morning, I promptly grabbed a newspaper and searched for a place to live. I felt defeated after a calling many places and having them all tell me the apartment was rented out. Finally, later that day, I found a place. The next day I moved in. By my second day in Boise, I was looking for a job and started at the mall. I walked into the first store and asked if they were hiring. It was Christmas season. They hired me a few hours later and I started training the next day. Three days in Boise, I had a place to live and a job.

Loneliness was my biggest obstacle at first. I had to work about 70-80 hours a week to pay my bills the first 6 months. I worked at jobs with people I really couldn't relate to. I liked them all but they all partied, drank, and smoked pot. And, I was always working. I curled up at night and prayed for God to bring me Christian friends.

But, God did more than that. He drew me closer to Himself. He used all of the silence to speak to me. I had seen God most of my life as a distant and powerful being. He could crush and destroy. In that time of silence, my heart began to be filled with a new love. Promises of who He really was. I think of Hosea where he says, "I will allure her, bring her into the wilderness and speak kindly to her."

I started to see God in a new light. A perfect and never ending love. My heart was mending. So many hurts, so many lies I had believed about myself, and bitterness was being washed away and replaced with a joy. I cannot put into words all that God did in me but for the first time in my life, I saw Him as a close, loving and intimate God who yearns for a relationship with us.

About two months after I moved here, I was hosting in a restaurant when a cute, bubbly server came over and introduced herself to me. She talked so fast I could hardly understand her. She asked me how I ended up in Boise. My response, "God."

Her eyes lit up. "You're a Christian!"

"Yes."

"I have a church for you." She told me about how a year ago, she had met some people passing through town who invited her to this brand new church. She grudgingly went, completely hungover and ready to find fault. That day, at the end of the service, she gave her life to Christ.

I hesitantly went to her church. Like her, expecting to find fault since I was pretty jaded from past "church" experiences. Instead, I found a group of people devoted to reaching others, loving, and seeking God. I found my family. Over the past five years, the church has grown from about 200 people to 2,000 impacting hundreds of lives. Mine included.

I prepare to move on to the mission field. To leave Boise and The Pursuit (my church) behind. These past five years have been anything but easy. But, I have my anchor. A place to call home. No matter where I roam, I will always know I have a group of people here devoted to praying for one another. I will still love that bubbly server, Steph, who has been an encouragement and good friend through the years. And, I will long for the beautiful mountains, the Boise River, and so much more that make this place exactly what God had intended for me.

I love Boise, Idaho. HOME.

Social Norm or Crazy?

2010-11-21T20:23:00.000-07:00

I love my church. It is filled with people who truly seek God and desire to do His will. We, like so many other churches in America, still fall under some brutal problems when it comes to our faith and obedience to God. The American church seems to be fairly complacent and not willing to challenge social norms. We are comfortable. Way too comfortable.

I've become so much more aware of the issue as I read the Word, attend leadership conferences, have traveled to Nicaragua, and am now preparing to go to Australia.

I had an epiphany, if you will, on my drive home from church today. Since choosing to leave my good-paying job and start training to become a foreign missionary, I have come under severe questioning about my motives, my heart, and my calling. I have had Christians I respect oppose me.

I understand accountability and respect it. What I don't understand, is why did no one have a problem with me getting up everyday to do the corporate grind, live in a nice apartment, buy new clothes and gym memberships, go out to eat, and attend a nice church on Sunday? Did anyone sit down with me and question my motives, where my heart was? Did anyone pray with me to make sure this is where God was leading my life?

Sure, I wasn't doing anything wrong. In fact, I was paying off debt, working hard, had good relationships, and supporting my church and missionaries financially.

When I chose to move forward, give up my security and follow a calling I have felt on my life for a really long time, all of a sudden, people become suspicious, cautious, act as if I am running from something, questioning if this is really what God wants from me.

If I had chosen to follow the "social norm" for America, no one would question God's call on my life. But, when I choose to step out in faith, leave the "huddle" and act, I meet with opposition. Making $50K a year sitting at a desk is a worthy cause, but traveling into jungles to love people and lead them to Christ is a problem? Are we really that afraid? Do we really not believe in the great commission? Is it really that hard to believe my heart was in the right place when pelted by commercialism and the need for "things" but it's not in the right place now?

I appreciate all the advice and concerns people have for me because I know my motives can stray. I am far from perfect and pure of heart. But, I am frustrated that it was fine for me, as an American Christian, to live comfortably without question.

Do I fear what lies ahead.... sometimes. I am more afraid of waking up some day to realize that everything in my life was vain, lives weren't changed, people perished because I was too busy following a social norm. God can work with or without me, but I don't want to stand before Him someday to have all of my good deeds burned up because they were never really good at all. I long to follow Him to the hurt and the broken, to love the unloved. American church, shouldn't that be our social norm? Shouldn't we be questioning anything less?

I love MercyMe's song CRAZY. "I have not been called to the wisdom of this world, but to a God who is calling out to me. And even though the world may think I'm losing touch with reality. It would be crazy to choose this world over eternity..."

Plane Tickets

2010-11-19T19:13:00.000-07:00

I now have my plane tickets to Australia! I just need 73% of my funding to go..... praise God, in 1 week I got 12%.

Dear God, We Need This Much Money

2010-11-14T19:57:00.000-07:00

Discouragement has been rearing it's ugly head lately. If only I weren't human and didn't have to fight my flesh!

I prayed on Thursday night as I left my life group. Should I keep forging on to Australia or play it safe, keep my job, and save more and more? So, as I drove, I prayed. Recognizing that God is so much bigger than my needs. What is any of this to a God who spoke and created the world?

But, I desire to do His will and want to make sure where I am headed is where he is leading.

An electronic billboard flashed through ads in the night sky as I headed downtown on the connector. A lottery sign flashed up. I laughed. When I was about 4 years old, my parents needed money for missions. We prayed as a family. With the absolute faith of a child, I prayed, "Dear God, we need 'this much' money." I held up my small hands indicating a large stack of bills. And, God showed up. Someone who knew my parents had purchased a lottery ticket.... a winning ticket for the exact amount of money my parents needed.

Here I am, 23 years later, praying the same prayer and God sent me a little reminder of how He always comes through.

The next day, I came home from work to find a $1000 check in the mail. I felt it was the confirmation I needed. Keep moving forward, don't give up, God is so much bigger!

NICARAGUA (Part 3)

2010-10-30T13:16:00.000-06:00

CONTINUED.....

The vendor. One man probably impacted my trip in Nicaragua more than any other. He was a slender guy, probably in his early twenties. I saw him on my first day in Diriamba. Mentally, he was a little lower functioning than most adults. He carried a bag of candy, selling 2 pieces for a small coin. As he stepped onto our bus, I couldn’t take my eyes off of him. Our eyes met and locked. There was nothing physically striking about him, but there was something defining in his spirit. His gaze held an assurance, innocence, and a peace I hadn’t seen.

With street noises, vendors shouting, and people talking on the bus, he began to sing. His voice wasn’t clear or strong or even beautiful. But, I was struck again. I didn’t know what he was singing but I had to listen. Then, he proceeded to sell his candy. Most people ignored him. After he left, I couldn’t get the humbling image of him out of my mind.

Days later, on another bus at another location, he stepped on. The same bag of candy was in his hands. This time it was a lot emptier. My heart sank when I saw this. It had been days and he hadn’t even sold all of the candy in his bag. How did he live off of less than 50 cents a day? He was in the same stained white shirt. And, then he sang. Above all the noise on the bus, he sang.

I turned to Kari and asked what he was singing about. She looked at me, “He says that God is the only thing that can satisfy man. He sings praise to God before he sells his candy.”

Here was a man who rose every morning to wander the streets and vend for not even enough to survive and he praised God. I found myself purchasing candy from him. I didn’t want the candy but I had to do something.

My heart cried out. “God, he is yours! He praises You when he has nothing. I am discontent when I have more than enough.” I continued to pray as we stepped off the bus and into the streets. I found myself praying that like the woman in the Bible whose oil never ran out, God would provide for this young man. That he would always have enough. His heart was so pure.

I smiled as I thought of his treasure in heaven. How foolish are we. Those who appear of little value in our world are the closest and dearest to God’s heart.

I could say so much more about my trip, but little could a book hold what God started in me. I faced trials like getting robbed, getting a parasite, being eaten alive by mosquitoes, taking freezing cold showers, and sweating day and night. It was not the most comfortable place to be. Yet, somehow I walked away fuller. Despite all the bad, God was there. God loves Nicaragua and the people in it. God continued to put the desire of missions in my heart.

It would be easy to go home, make good money, live well, be comfortable but I would be missing the fullness of what God can do in me. God doesn’t need me to impact the world. I can offer nothing to His cause, but I am held in awe by how He longs for me. He wants to use me…. Me of all people! Nicaragua was a first step, a glimpse into what He can do.

In Plato’s “Republic”, there is a cave analogy. In it people have spent their whole lives being chained to a cave wall. Shadows from a fire cast on the wall are their only reality. They are unaware of anything outside of the cave and those shadows. I realized at that point, my life was only a partial truth. I had only lived in a fraction of what the world is really like, of what people really experience. I could crawl back into the cave and be comforted by my mere shadows or I can face the world outside. To grow in the fullness of drawing closer to the heart of God. This is where I want to live.

NICARAGUA (Part 2)

2010-10-25T17:02:00.001-06:00

Continued...

The kids. You had to be in Nicaragua no more than a few hours before you started falling in love with the kids. While many of the adults appeared indifferent, the kids were anything but. They all had beautiful round faces with big dark brown eyes and bigger smiles. They wanted to know you, where you were from; they all wanted to be held by you. Even the shy ones longed for your attention. I remember coming back from the ocean on my first day only to be greeted by about 6 boys and a little girl waiting at the front gate. These were the neighborhood kids. Turns out they were almost all related. The “primos” as I dubbed them. They all asked a thousand questions in Spanish. Laughing, pointing, and playing around.

Unlike my experience with American kids, Nicaraguan kids were much more independent. They wandered the streets, came in and out of the house, and looked out for each other. We spent evenings with 10 or so kids sprawled out on the tile floors, sharing a handful of colored pencils. Laughing, singing, and vying for our attention. While some got rough with each other, and they could be wound-up from time to time, they lacked the spoiled nature of a lot of kids I have been around. They had a contentment I was not use to experiencing. And, they loved. I felt immediately loved and accepted by these little people.

Fernando. The oldest of the kids was Fernando. It was love at first sight. He was the natural born leader of the group. He had one of the most handsome little faces with big dimples, a crooked smile, and an intelligence in his eyes that proceeded his years. He was small for eleven years, but most Nicaraguans were smaller than me. He had compassionate soul even though he had faced a lot of hardship at his tender age. He was special. I pray for that boy on a daily basis. People will look to him for guidance as they get older. He is at a crossroads. He will either be a great man of God or do a lot of evil. I can’t help but see God’s hand in that boy’s life. I immediately wanted to love him, to take care of him, to raise him, and to just hold him in my arms and take away all the hurt he had faced. Oh, but how much more does our God love him!

Fernando was a revelation for me. I always knew that one day I would want to adopt kids but had no idea how I could pick one when so many needed to be loved and cared for. I was made aware of how possible it was. I also realized in a heartbeat, I could give up all of my “freedoms” as a single person to make a better life for someone else.

Transportation. If going anywhere nearby, you walk. We walked all over the city, to the barrio, out to Orlando’s farm. If we wanted to go to another city, we hopped into an old van filled with people and paid about 5 cents. If you like your personal space, you will not survive. The van was crammed with people. Then, we rumbled off to the next destination, the person who collected money hanging out the window shouting our destination to anyone we passed, hoping to get a few more passengers. If we were going anywhere far away, we took the bus. Normally, it was an old school bus with painted images of saints and the Virgin Mary over the front dash. The bus didn’t leave until it was full. And, not just every seat full, but every molecule of space. Roofing materials, tires, shopping bags, pets, and people were crammed in. Three to a seat and standing room was taken. You couldn’t fall over and we bounced and fast speeds down the Pan American. The breeze blew through the open windows cooling us all down. Amazingly, there was no smell of humanity. Nicaraguans are very conscious of their personal hygiene. The bus mostly smelled of blooming plants from outside, car exhaust, and cologne.

At every stop, vendors somehow found a way to walk up and down the aisles, shouting out their goods, and selling to the passengers. How they maneuvered around people, I’m not sure but it worked.

My favorite part of the rides were when all of the school children packed onto the bus. They all were wearing their white collared shirts; blue slacks or skirts and carried their packs. They laughed and pushed. They made eye contact and smiled. Then they would reach their stop, and run off down a muddy side road or chase a soccer ball. I was amazed at how clean they always looked when the red dirt of the roads were muddy and rutted.

NICARAGUA (Part 1)

2010-10-23T14:26:00.001-06:00

It’s been a few months since I was in Nicaragua. Life seems to just flash by sometimes. But, I want to revisit it. I don’t want to forget. There was so much to take in, I think I’ll look back years later and fully realize the impact those 10 days had on my life.

Nicaragua was my first step back into foreign missions since I was a child. I was amazed at how many forgotten memories flashed through my mind just due to smells and hearing Spanish all around me. I was more impacted by how little I saw as a child.

We circled the Managua airport for about an hour in the plane. The fog was so thick and the thunderstorm so bad, we couldn’t land. Finally we were cleared for landing…. Right about when the power went out at the airport. We hit the ground with great force, the plane braking and a skidding sideways. I am normally terrified of flying but for some reason, all I could do was laugh as people on the plane screamed. Welcome to Nicaragua.

We passed through the dark and quiet city as rain pounded the fogged windows of the car. I saw a few billboards plastered with smiling dark-haired people who looked more “American” than Nicaraguan. After an hour drive through thick fog on the Pan American Highway, we reached Diriamba. Within five minutes of entering Kari and Andrea’s home, I saw a gecko, a mouse, and a cockroach. The first two critters did not bother me nearly as much as the palm-sized insect. Andrea stepped on it. Crunch, white ooze spilled out of the body.

The smells. Diriamba smelled like no other place I have been. The air was thick with humidity and burning. Most people cooked on wood stoves due to costs of electric and gas. They also burned their trash. If it is possible, the air smelled strongly of wet smoke. Due to thunderstorms on a daily basis, it permeated even from the water, clinging to your skin and clothes. After a few days, however, it was almost unnoticeable.

The sounds. Unlike nights in the United States with background noises of electronics and clocks or perhaps traffic on the street, it was silent. Once it grew dark, everyone went inside and it was quiet. Usually a storm interrupted the quiet to rain down into the courtyards and beat on the tin roofs. The silence would occasionally be broken by the throaty calls of a gecko. Until you’ve heard one, you can’t really understand.

Dogs would bark from time to time. Then it would be eerily silent again only to have a mango drop from a tree onto the tin roof. Bam! It sounded like an explosion, jerking me awake with my heart racing. On a windy night they would drop and roll down the roof at a frequent rate. The noise was so loud you thought a full grown person had jumped onto the roof. Finally, whistles would sound throughout the night. It was night guards checking the streets. I wasn’t sure if the whistles were to warn or something or signal that all was well.

Mornings came early. The sun came up around 5 am and so did the city. It started with cries of children awakening, dogs barking in the homes, and pigs. Oh, yes, the neighbors had a pig. The pig went through a ritualistic death squeal at just about 5 am every morning. He wasn’t dying. He was just practicing it. I would roll over and attempt to stop my ears with the pillow but it did no good. Carts and taxis rumbled by, blaring horns and people walking up and down the streets shouting out goods to buy. Someone stood out side the gate inquiring if we wanted any plantains or pico.

Since the houses consisted of plaster walls shared by neighbors, tile floors, open court yards, and tin roofs with no insulation, you had no choice but to share your life with the neighbors.
Getting ready in the morning didn’t take much. We munched on pico (a triangular refined white bread with sugar), did our best to emulate a mocha, and spread out throughout the house to read our Bibles and journal. There was a lot to journal.

Toiletry was as primitive as modern day allows. With a small broken mirror propped up on the table, we took turns doing our hair. Mine was so curly from the humidity I was lucky if I could run a brush through it. It just clung to my neck and forehead. The water rarely ran during the day, so we filled a bowl with water from the reserve and scrubbed down our faces and necks in the courtyard. We brushed our teeth over the drain which ran through the courtyard and then just spit into it…. Everything from the shower, sinks, etc ran through this open drain and out into the sewage.

Our laundry, towels and wash clothes were draped over the line in the courtyard or clinging to the metal gates at the openings of the different areas of the house. It took days for things to dry. If we were not quick enough, sometimes, it would rain on the drying clothes, adding to the days we had to wait for them to dry.
The streets. Imagine rows, upon rows of colorful but dirty houses with cracked and pealing paint. There were no yards, no spaces between buildings. All exterior walls were shared with the house next to yours.

Everything was behind metal bars. Andrea and Kari had a small front courtyard with some plants but metal gates with a bar covered roof led into their front door. The front door had another metal gate. The sidewalks varied in height and were much narrower than in the United States. The streets were paved mostly with bricks and were deeply rutted with potholes. Trash and mud filled in the cracks. Starving dogs wandered up and down the streets while people, cars, horses, carts, and bikes all avoided hitting each other. Taxi horns blared to communicate anything from “get out of the way” to “do you need a ride”. While it doesn’t sound appealing, there was an incredible charm and personality to the streets. Everything seemed so much closer, people sat with their doors and windows open, calling out to one another.

The barrio. The barrio was another story. The roads that ran through were mud and dirt. Homes were plane cinderblock with packed dirt floors. There weren’t always doors but open holes for windows and doors. They had yards in the barrio, protected by crude barbed wire fences and strung with clothes lines. A lot of their toilets were separate from their homes and their sinks were set up in the front yard rather than in the house. Barefoot children ran around in their underwear and peeped at us from behind plants and doorways.

“Adios,” they shouted and then quickly blushed and averted their eyes.

..... to be continued.

HECTIC LIFE, SWEET HECTIC LIFE

2010-10-04T18:57:00.000-06:00

Well, I just spent the weekend moving in with one of my best friends. Life has been crazy with full-time work.... aka 40+ hours, moving, raising support for the land of Aussies, getting immunizations, filling out blue cards, and visa info, etc....

God is providing. I am currently between 3.5-4% funding. It's small but it's better than 0% any day.

I'm so excited to go, sometimes I cannot contain it. I need to stop anticipating just a little because I think I'm reaching the point it cannot possibly meet my expectations. I love Boise; I must live in the present and enjoy where I am at.

This weekend was a good reminder how many amazing things God has done for me over the years. I was leading worship at Sunday school when I realized how hard it will be to leave those kids. I've been serving with them for over 4 years! I get so many hugs on Sunday. Elle made me a clay cat and drawings.

Met with a friend of mine, Christina, this weekend for coffee. What an encouragement! God totally brought her, Janat, and I together in a big way with Janat's planning to move to Krygzstan. It has spilled into our relationships beyond being Janat's accountability. Praise God for amazing people in our lives! Praise God for putting His desires on our hearts!

I wish I had something deep or more informative to say, but I am currently brain dead from a long day of work and life. Now, to eat, run, and put away more of my boxes.

Love you all. Will update more later. Need to put up my in depth post about Nicaragua soon.

ACCEPTED!

2010-09-22T18:56:00.000-06:00

Just got the official word from YWAM. I am officially accepted into the January course. I'm going to AUSTRALIA in January!!!

GOD KNOWS

2010-09-09T10:55:00.001-06:00

I'm going to have to write about my trip to Nicaragua this summer in bits and pieces. Realistically, it took up over half a journal of front and back page writing while I was out there. I felt if I didn't write every detail in my journal, it wouldn't do the trip justice..... it still didn't.

As most people know, my first day in Diriamba was more than an adventure. I got robbed. While this did not define my trip, it certainly set a tone and taught me a lot. It challenged my view to love and trust. And, it confirmed some truths I already knew.

I was having dinner with friends on the main street when I was robbed. My camera (if anyone knows me, it is my most prized possession) was sitting in my lap under the table cloth. I have been doing photography for at least 10 years and whether I am home or abroad it is on my person. We had finished dinner and were enjoying good conversation when all I remember is feeling my camera being grabbed. I reacted, grabbing onto the strap. Within seconds I was pulled backward out of my chair and into the street.... the restaurant is open-air. I kept holding on. I'm pretty sure I was yelling at the 2 guys robbing me but it happened so fast. I had a death grip on the strap but the thief was strong.... (thanks to rock climbing for the strength in my hands!) After being drug about 6 feet, the thief gave my camera one last tug and broke my hold. Feet pounded past my head as I lay face first in the street.

I had contemplated getting up and running after the guys, after all, I can run 1/2 marathons. But in a skirt and flip-flops and unknown town, catching them would be hard.... and then what, I'm not exactly a skilled fighter. It took me a little while to realize the guys I was with had run after the thieves. Andrea and Kari, my missionary friends, helped me up. I walked back to the sidewalk and started pacing, worried about Freddy and Orlando since they disappeared around a corner after the camera stealer's. Then, I started shaking. My whole body seemed to be loosing control. I sat down and just started crying. Big, heavy tears. I couldn't control it. My mind was catching up with everything that happened.

I then felt sticky, wet on my legs. I pulled up my long skirt revealing torn up knees and blood dripping into my shoes. Swelling and bruises were started to form on my legs. All of a sudden pain rolled over me. My adrenaline had been so strong I hadn't felt it for about 15 minutes. A local woman ran and grabbed napkins and water to clean up my legs. Andrea stood with her hand on my back, wide-eyed and unsure what to do or say. We had to wait for the guys to return.

I remember I was angry, so angry that someone thought they had a right to my things. Angry because they didn't know me, they didn't know the months I had saved for my camera, how hard I worked. Everything I owned I prized and took care of. They just thought they had a right to it. They thought because I was an American I just had the money to buy what I want when I wanted it. I wasn't angry at the thieves so much as I was at the sin.

I was also angry at the apathy. There were people all over the streets and only my friends did something about it. People watched me get drug through the street. Had just 1 or 2 stepped up, the thieves wouldn't have made it far. I felt convicted. How often did I stand by and not act when I knew I should? Hadn't I seen little injustices and not stopped because I didn't have the time or it wasn't my problem? One of my favorite quotes resounded, "All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing." All those apathetic people in the streets were probably pretty good people by the world's standards. You don't have to be a bad person to allow evil, you just have to do nothing about it. And if you are unaware of injustice it's probably because you don't want to know and not because you just don't know.

Within those seconds, I felt so alone. A street full of people and I still was hurt. Then, I heard it. The gentle voice that stills your spirit. "But, Erin, I know. I care. I love you. You have to trust me in this." God broke in at that moment. I felt a peace I never knew before wash over me. God knows. God is here. He is present and He is active.

I recognized the creator of the universe knew this happened. He also knew the men who robbed me. He knew their hearts. I saw it at that moment. Maybe this wasn't even about me. What if no one had ever prayed for the thieves? What if they never knew love? What if this was God's way of pursuing them? So I prayed. I prayed for the young men who robbed me. I cried out to God for them. What are the odds they rob a Christian? God knew, this wasn't a chance encounter but a huge opportunity. I will continue to pray for them until I die. Let this be the turning point in their lives. I get excited to think when I get to heaven how cool it will be to run into them!

I also recognized what God has done in me. It is my nature to explode in anger. I have a flaring temper. And, certainly far from a righteous anger. God clearly has been working for me to pray for those men rather than want to track them down and make them pay. (Don't get me wrong, in the heat of the moment I wanted so badly to punch them in the face.)

A few more lessens were learned in this time, as well. I never knew how I would react in a situation like this. My dad always taught me to fight back. He use to tell me you never hear survivor stories from people who give in. He also told me if a criminal intends to hurt you, they will hurt you whether you react or not. I'm glad to know within the split second I had to react, I refused to be a victim.

When I returned to the US, I learned another valuable lesson. While talking to a wonderful woman in my church, Pam Hunt, she responded with the best reaction I had heard. "You know, everything you have is God's, right? If this is how God chooses to use His camera and the money spent on it, then you should trust Him in this." Amen. All I have is God's. He can give and He can take. Do I really believe that or do I say it because I think I should?

That Sunday, my pastor gave a message and spoke about Job's reaction. Job asked, "Should we accept good from the Lord and not adversity?"

But most importantly, God knows.

SUPPORT LETTER

2010-09-03T20:24:00.000-06:00

THE START... Last fall I was convicted to put forth might and mane into becoming debt-free. I moved out of my apartment and in with a friend, cutting my cost of living in half. I knew this would open a lot more doors for me but wasn’t sure exactly where it was leading.

Fast-forward to January of this year. As I was exercising one evening, I was praying about where my life was headed. I knew I wasn’t intended to be handling claims for the rest of my life. I felt called to utilize my artistic talents and love for kids to work with developing countries and underprivileged children but really had no idea where to start. I thought through what the first step might look like and knew I needed to get some form of training before walking blindly into a developing country.

WHY AUSTRALIA... It became clear I was to start my training in the “land down under” after praying about it. Australia was the choice for a lot of reasons.

-When I prayed I felt like God wanted me there.

-It will get me out of my cultural comfort zone and they speak English (well, sort of). I, unfortunately, do not know any other language well enough to effectively take courses in anything but English.

-While researching, I found out only about 4% of Australians are followers of Christ. In fact, for a warm-culture, they have a very high suicide rate. I’m excited to get to know and love people who may not have hope right now. I have been convicted to be more intentional in my relationships since experiencing someone committing suicide in college.

-I know many people who have lived there. All will attest to how much they love Australians! All Aussies I know are fantastic, fun-loving people. Who wouldn’t want to be around a culture like that?

WHAT I’LL BE DOING… After a lot of prayer, research, and contacting many organizations, I decided on Youth With a Mission. The plan is to attend their Discipleship Training School in January 2011 in Townsville, Queensland.

This school focuses on our personal relationships with God, along with outreach and missions. It is about 6 months long.

We will have the opportunity to travel into the Outback to work with indigenous groups, as well as, travel to Southeast Asia for a 4-6 week long missions trip. In doing this, I will be better equipped and educated for a much more long-term life of missions.

WHAT IT WILL TAKE… A year ago, God put Proverbs 31:8-9 on my heart as a mission statement for my life. "Open your mouth for the mute, for the rights of all the unfortunate.... and defend the rights of the afflicted and needy." There is no denying this is a commitment. It won’t always be easy. All “romantic” ideas of missions were swept away on my recent trip to Nicaragua. It is hard work; it is hard to be in a new culture; it is hard to be away from the familiar; it is hard to see a level of suffering and sometimes injustice most of us will never understand.

More than anything, I need your support through prayer. We were created for community. I will need my community in Boise and around the world to love on me, encourage me, and pray for me. If you have received this letter, it is because I hold you in esteem and want you to be a part of my journey. You can follow this adventure on my blog http://huskerfoley7.blogspot.com/. But, most of all, pray for me.

Finally, this adventure and training will take money. The good news is, God provides no matter what. I’ve seen Him provide time and time again in my life. I am blessed in knowing this and hope you can be a part of this blessing.

If you have any questions on how much is needed or where the money will be going, please check out my blog.

With Love,

Erin Foley

Isaiah 43:1: …“Do not be afraid, for I have ransomed you. I have called you by name; you are mine…”

My Resolve... Dream Big, Act Bigger

2010-08-30T22:51:00.001-06:00

Today I've been pelted with discouragement. Practically drenched in it. I almost let it get to me, then I thought. Really thought. My jaw clenched, my heels dug in. Resolute, yes. Stubborn, indeed.

I remember when I was little I would just decide I wasn't going to do something and use every part of my being to make that happen. I can still see my mom wielding the yard stick. I'd tense up like a board. Whack, whack. I wasn't going to wince. She'd pick me up by my fists, balled at my side and carry me. I still don't remember why I wasn't going to do what she asked. I'm not even sure I had a reason. I would not give in.

I'm still stubborn, but I've got a better grasp on picking my battles. So when discouragement reared it's ugly head, I had a choice to make. You see, I have spent my last few years convicted of how unreliable I am. I say "yes" to everything and follow through sparingly. After a few people I really admire pointed out my flaw, I decided to let my "yes" be "yes" and my "no" be "no". A few years ago while leading worship in Sunday school we sang a simple song about people being able to depend on us. I realized, I cannot expect the kids to mean it if I did not mean it. Now, I do. It took God doing a lot of work in me. It took turning down the "better" options for the one I was already committed to.

That's why it deeply discouraged me to have so many people recently look upon decisions I have made as half-thought out and unprepared. I was questioned on a laundry list of things they assumed I never considered. Little knowing, I have been praying and preparing for this decision for almost 9 months. I spent 6 months just praying about it and weighing the options. Once I decided on a course of action, I surrounded myself with knowledgeable, encouraging people to help me begin my task. This decision being the one to move to Australia and start courses to become a missionary. It hurt the most to have a good friend call it "hair brained" and tell me I am wasting my talent and God's time.

Interestingly enough, just hours before I got her e-mail I had been reading my Bible and praying. God reminded me of my move to Boise. I had nothing but people telling me it was a terrible idea. I didn't know anyone in Boise, I didn't have a job, I didn't have a place to live, but somehow I knew I was suppose to be in Boise. Almost 5 years and many trials later, I can tell you I still know without a doubt this is where I was suppose to be. Not one person encouraged me or agreed with my move. But I knew it was what God wanted.

While preparing is important, I think our culture places too much emphasis on all of the options. Are there options when God is calling? Did the disciples sit around wondering if it was better to leave their jobs or to follow Jesus? Did they call a council, look for signs, ask their parents? No, they got up and went.

A co-worker pointed out to me I may not be able to come back and get a better paying job. She's right. I make pretty good money for my age. She's right. The economy may not get better. I don't want to spend my life living for what may or may not happen. I dream big, but I want to act bigger.

Pastor Harvey Carey described the American church as a team that gets in a huddle and stays in the huddle. The church talks and talks about the action it will take but it never gets on the field and plays. What would the world look like if we really believed that God was strong enough? What if our actions reflected our words?

I appreciate people's concerns for me. But, I'm tired of dreaming big and never following through. I'm beyond weighing options. I stubbornly believe I am called to this. I am afraid at times, I've calculated the risks, but I'm more afraid of living a life and never truly acting as big as I dream.

Betsie ten Boom once told her sister after a bomb went off showering their home in shrapnel, "There are no 'if's' in God's kingdom. And, no places that are safer than any other. The center of His will is our only safety..." That's my resolve.

Revamp

2010-08-28T13:46:00.002-06:00

Worn out from giving my old "college" blog a whole new look and purpose. Will update soon.

BACK ON.

2010-01-17T20:45:00.001-07:00

I'm getting back on this to view the Getchell's blog. I didn't realize this still existed until it automatically logged me on again one day.